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What was more over this, once I got to the house I would be treading water all the way through and would probably wake people up trying to get things dry. I wasn’t looking forward to being questioned about why I was out in the dead of the night naked in the lake. Regardless, I had no choice. I turned back around and swam a little towards the shore. My eyes hadn’t adjusted properly to the dark yet and everything around seemed to blend together. Getting closer I began to make out that something was on the platform. “Amy, is that you?” It was in fact, someone. Finch's voice was unmistakable. He asked with a sense of bewilderment. I stopped in my tracks and my heart raced to the pit of my stomach. I tread the water around me yet again and thought for a minute about how I was about to explain myself. “Errr, yeah, it’s me,” I pitifully replied. There was a brief pause before he spoke again. “I was going to ask you what you were doing, but I think I can gather.” “I’m actually getting out. I didn't feel sexy. I mean, I wasn't getting off on this at all, but some part of me found it interesting, if that makes sense. Answering questions, being the focus of all that attention, it was like a snake slithering into my tummy. This whole business had an insidious nature to it and I wondered at my vulnerability. I'd been seduced once, was it happening again? Could it, now that I was forewarned?There was a confusion inside me, and the hate and disgust and humiliation would never go away, I knew that. But are there such things as mutually exclusive emotions? Or was it possible to be repulsed and attracted to something all at once? I wanted to fight it, you have no idea how badly, and this seemed very much like all the nonsense about victims wanting their rape, aiding their attacker's efforts. It was a lie, a myth, and I knew that for a fact, but this wasn't rape ... Was it? Stockholm Syndrome is a very real effect, one widely studied and reasonably understood. Was my situation.
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